I asked myself, was this endeavor really worth it, or I'm just crossing my fingers hoping that I wouldn't run away this time?
Five days... It only took me five days to feel this depression sinking in. This afternoon, our helper woke me up for a phone call from office. It was our finance manager and she's asking me if I could lend her 15k to fill up the remaining balance they have to deposit in the bank to avoid the cheques from bouncing. Learning from my bitter mistakes a year ago, I told them I could only lend them 5k and that's all.
Either than get nothing, she accepted my offer and I was frustrated the whole day after.
You see, I was there when the business was in its darkest hour a year ago. Everyday, cheques were bouncing, the printing press and the newsprint refused to deliver the services we need for our product, and we're only weeks before we close due to bankruptcy.
The financial department kept on asking me if I could lend some cash because they are strapped, I obliged not knowing that it would take a week before they could fully replace what they borrowed. However, the salt that really rubbed the wound was that, both the highest officers kept on putting their grudges ahead of the business. Instead of facing the problems united, we end up either I, overriding their decisions to have an outcome, or let them fight till one of them surrenders at the end of the day.
I endured for several months, often running away everytime when things get worse. After all, the whole scenario makes me really helpless - Our business opened up the concept of helplessness in me. No wonder, I would exchange anything just to feel a little bit secured.
So there, I was fighting an endless war, not knowing how things would end. I fought using a hit and run tactic - often hiding in places were hope still exist which is our security agency. At the end, my dad's associate plotted to render us, completely incapacitated to produce a single copy of a newspaper and it was the dirtiest trick I've ever seen in my life.
It began on a rainy October morning of 2003. Rumors of mutiny was in the air. Morale was at all-time low since the employees hasn't recieved their salary for almost two months already, while my dad kept on blaming and cursing the accounting department for fucking up their jobs.
All was set to burn that afternoon. I was personally asked to man the accounting department since the finance manager resigned a day before. Then, the unexpected happen. 85% of the whole editorial staff never reported for office. Only a news editor an encoder and two layout artist were able to report. I was outrightly summoned by my dad to proceed immediately at our QC office. Things were grim when I got there.
With Divine Intervention and hope, we were able to close an issue that night. In our publications history, a newspaper was closed by a single news editor, 3 layout-artist cum encoder and one proofreader. Things were getting worse, but we saw everything as an independence. For the first time, our family had free reign in the office.
Three days after, we found a new finance manager. Of the 10 people we had in the accounting department, only 5 remained. Since the production deparment was united behind the production manager which is my aunt, nobody left their post.
I saw myself persuading for the accounting staff to remain. I even asked them to give us a week to let them feel secured in their work. I even promised them 3 months for recovery. I don't know if such actions from top-level officers were witnessed by employees in other companies, but I did it.
I did it so that we could survive.
A week after, we have replaced almost everyone who left their posts. People kept coming in, because after all, we had the name in the publishing business. Though our color-seperation machine was confiscated by its dealer, we were able to find a company who could provide us with the same services, slowly, the name which was severely damaged by its previous administration... is slowly being recovered.
Those who left us established a new newspaper, a tabloid to directly compete with us. Until now they still exist, but it seems like karma is getting back at them... slowly but surely.
As for us, we're still facing serious problem every now and then. But the experience we faced before taught me humility and respect towards those who would not abandon you in the face of death. I tend to get frustrated whenever I analyze things that would resemble our nightmarish past. I was there fighting... and running away at a distance, but the trauma it produced remain embedded deep in me now.
All I've asked for is hope... and harmony in the office and slight failures easily frustrates me. I don't know what will happen tomorrow, but relating the things we have gone through and somehow survive it all, till today makes me a litte bit relieved... and faithful, that a Higher Power guides us.
I'm ok now. Finally I can go to sleep.
Five days... It only took me five days to feel this depression sinking in. This afternoon, our helper woke me up for a phone call from office. It was our finance manager and she's asking me if I could lend her 15k to fill up the remaining balance they have to deposit in the bank to avoid the cheques from bouncing. Learning from my bitter mistakes a year ago, I told them I could only lend them 5k and that's all.
Either than get nothing, she accepted my offer and I was frustrated the whole day after.
You see, I was there when the business was in its darkest hour a year ago. Everyday, cheques were bouncing, the printing press and the newsprint refused to deliver the services we need for our product, and we're only weeks before we close due to bankruptcy.
The financial department kept on asking me if I could lend some cash because they are strapped, I obliged not knowing that it would take a week before they could fully replace what they borrowed. However, the salt that really rubbed the wound was that, both the highest officers kept on putting their grudges ahead of the business. Instead of facing the problems united, we end up either I, overriding their decisions to have an outcome, or let them fight till one of them surrenders at the end of the day.
I endured for several months, often running away everytime when things get worse. After all, the whole scenario makes me really helpless - Our business opened up the concept of helplessness in me. No wonder, I would exchange anything just to feel a little bit secured.
So there, I was fighting an endless war, not knowing how things would end. I fought using a hit and run tactic - often hiding in places were hope still exist which is our security agency. At the end, my dad's associate plotted to render us, completely incapacitated to produce a single copy of a newspaper and it was the dirtiest trick I've ever seen in my life.
It began on a rainy October morning of 2003. Rumors of mutiny was in the air. Morale was at all-time low since the employees hasn't recieved their salary for almost two months already, while my dad kept on blaming and cursing the accounting department for fucking up their jobs.
All was set to burn that afternoon. I was personally asked to man the accounting department since the finance manager resigned a day before. Then, the unexpected happen. 85% of the whole editorial staff never reported for office. Only a news editor an encoder and two layout artist were able to report. I was outrightly summoned by my dad to proceed immediately at our QC office. Things were grim when I got there.
With Divine Intervention and hope, we were able to close an issue that night. In our publications history, a newspaper was closed by a single news editor, 3 layout-artist cum encoder and one proofreader. Things were getting worse, but we saw everything as an independence. For the first time, our family had free reign in the office.
Three days after, we found a new finance manager. Of the 10 people we had in the accounting department, only 5 remained. Since the production deparment was united behind the production manager which is my aunt, nobody left their post.
I saw myself persuading for the accounting staff to remain. I even asked them to give us a week to let them feel secured in their work. I even promised them 3 months for recovery. I don't know if such actions from top-level officers were witnessed by employees in other companies, but I did it.
I did it so that we could survive.
A week after, we have replaced almost everyone who left their posts. People kept coming in, because after all, we had the name in the publishing business. Though our color-seperation machine was confiscated by its dealer, we were able to find a company who could provide us with the same services, slowly, the name which was severely damaged by its previous administration... is slowly being recovered.
Those who left us established a new newspaper, a tabloid to directly compete with us. Until now they still exist, but it seems like karma is getting back at them... slowly but surely.
As for us, we're still facing serious problem every now and then. But the experience we faced before taught me humility and respect towards those who would not abandon you in the face of death. I tend to get frustrated whenever I analyze things that would resemble our nightmarish past. I was there fighting... and running away at a distance, but the trauma it produced remain embedded deep in me now.
All I've asked for is hope... and harmony in the office and slight failures easily frustrates me. I don't know what will happen tomorrow, but relating the things we have gone through and somehow survive it all, till today makes me a litte bit relieved... and faithful, that a Higher Power guides us.
I'm ok now. Finally I can go to sleep.
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