Out

For a very long time, I have dreamed of outing myself to a effeminate gay guy who is far far advanced than me. I have dreamed of exchanging notes with them, knowing that between PLUs and sterotyped effeminates, there are a lot of things we don't know about ourselves.



Being drunk myself, I voluntarily told everything to Paulie, my ex-vice president who showed me what being non-straight was, before I could even find myself testing the waters separating non-straights from the straights.



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It just came too fast. I found myself telling him, my innermost thoughts and experiences being like this. In just two years, I've realized that I came that far - too far for anyone from anyone apart from ODDERs to realize.



I was still flirting with women the last time I confided him my stories. This time, I was almost telling him the things that I've done during my slutty days.



Finally I found the courage to bridge the gap between my college and post college life. It's just a matter of time before I tell my mom and my sis what I have become.



Nobody's to blame anyway, I think what my dad did, and how I managed to exists without a dad

only propelled things, the way nobody expected it to be.



Right now I think, despite everything, I have become one of the most OUT guys among my friends. I owe it to them the courage and strength to live a life like this. Finding myself in the company of non-straight men would leave me uncomfortable before - now, I find solace and comfort knowing, that a whole table of non-straight folks have terrorized another bar again.



Tonight, I've realized that those who know my present, my non-straight life would have a permanent place in my future. I think, I can never turn back now. What Papu prophesized before has already happened.



From being a curious to bisexual to completely being a homosexual. It was, just a blink of an eye

for the transformation to be complete.



Welcome to Phankspace Paulie. Nawa'y makita mo ang mga nakwento mo sa akin noon, ngayon sa bagong storya ng buhay ko. I am, looking forward to have a long and nice chat with you one day.