Ang Familia Orvina, Bow

1. Nagsimula ang lahat sa isang inuman. Kasama doon si Roy at Dodong mula sa hanay ng Outsiders; Si Centurion at Deathnote mula sa Walang Mukha Thread (na naging Encantadia na ngayon) at si Macoy na kinatawan ng Blog Alliance, na sumunod galing sa Wensha sa aming tambayan sa Quatro.

2. Nakakadalawang Macho Mug ng Red Horse na ako, at di makakailang may tama na kami pare-pareho. Sa hindi malamang dahilan, itong si Dodong ay naglabas ng isang pasabog na siyang sisira sa reputasyon ko.

"Sabi ni Dodong, Pusong Ina ka daw."

Ang angas-angas ko kaya, paano ako nagkaroon ng impression bilang motherly? Dahil ba ako ang tiga akay ng mga nalalasing?

3. Si Deathnote na nanahimik nang mga oras na iyon ay biglang nagkaroon ng ideya. Palibhasa ay tadtad ng mga binatilyong PLU ang aming thread sa G4M na tila naghahanap ng role models, ako ang una nilang binigyan ng pangalan.

Nanay.

Amfufu.

4. Ilang beses kong binalaan si DN na huwag na huwag niya akong tatawaging nanay dahil sa ito'y pasira ng karir, ngunit pasaway ang binata. Mabuti na lamang at hindi ako nawalan ng prospect dahil dito.

5. Nang lumaon ay may tinawag na bunsong kapatid ang aking panganay. Noong una ay hesitant akong siya ay ampunin dahil hindi naman kami close. Subalit mapilit ang aking anak. Siya ang naging ikalawa.

6. Nagkaroon sila ng ikatlong kapatid. Subalit dahil muntikan nang magkaroon ng namamagitan sa aming dalawa ng kanyang utol (isipin niyo na lang yung xrated film na Taboo 2) nang minsang pauwi kami sa loob ng taxi, tinigil ko ang aming role play kinabukasan.

7. Nilaglag ko rin ang kanilang utol dahil sa aming incest na ginawa.

8. Kung inyong tatanungin, tinanggap ko ang role bilang nanay upang magsilbing distraction sa aking palasak na relasyon. Sa halip na maglaro ng apoy at makiapid sa iba, pinili ko ang magkaroon ng mas mabuting pakinabang at maging tigasubaybay ng mga nakababatang PLU sa akin.

9. Muling nabuhay ang aming roleplay nang makumbinsi ko ang aking bunso at panganay na gumawa ng account sa Twitter.

10. Bitbit ang kanilang mga naiwang kaibigan sa G4M, pinakilala ko ang aking mga anak, kasama ang kanilang mga kasamahan sa tiga Trippers Clan.

Dito nabuo ang aming family tree.

Encantadia (Act Two)

Dumating kami sa resort na pagod at walang laman ang sikmura. Maliban sa kornik na binuksan ni Dabo habang iniintay ang pagdating ni Bloiggster sa Shopwise Antipolo, ang huling kain ko ay alas 9 pa ng umaga.

Hindi nakapagtataka na habang binabagtas namin ang pabulusok na hagdan patungo sa aming cottege ay hindi ako makausap ng matino ninuman. Bukod kasi sa mabigat ang buhat-buhat kong mga galon ng mineral water ay nanginginig na rin ako sa gutom.

Kung inyong tatanungin, bakit hinayaan kong maging ganun ang aking kundisyon. Ang sagot: katakawan. Alam kong sa oras na magkalaman ang tiyan ko - maging ito'y sa pamamagitan ng paglamon ng isang mamon ay tiyak, panghihinaan akong kumain pagdating ng hapunan. Sayang naman ang mga pagkaing dinala ng mga kasama ko.

Ang aming cottege ay malapit sa swimming pool. Sa hindi malamang dahilan ay mukhang sadyang pinili ng organizer ang spot kung saan katapat lang namin ang men's shower room. Kayo na ang bahala mag-interpret ng mga bagay-bagay, pero isang dahilan kung bakit nabusog ang mga mata ko noong gabing iyon ay dahil sa dami ng eye-candy na aking nakita.

Mabilis pa sa alas kuwatro na naihanda ang mga pagkain sa lamesa. Naroon ang balde-baldeng kanin, adobong baboy, pansit bihon, lumpiang shanghai, ginisang hipon at pati na rin ang custard cake na sadyang bi-nake pa ni Pedok para sa okasyon. Lingid sa kaalaman ng marami ay matagal ko nang kilala si Pedok, subalit dahil nabibilang kami sa magkaibang paksyon sa loob ng isang grupo, ito marahil ang pangalawang beses na nagkasama kami sa iisang lamesa matapos ang unang pagkikita namin sa Tagaytay.

Malalim na ang gabi kaya't kaagad rin kaming lumusong sa pool upang walang masayang na oras sa aming paglagi. Dahil nasa tuktok ng bundok ang aming resort, tiyak na pamatay ang tubig sa lamig nito. Si Dabo ang may sala kung bakit napalangoy ako kahit nagpapahinga pa ang iba naming mga kasama. Mukha yatang pangarap niyang mabansagang sirena sa mundo ng aming munting Encantadia.

Nakailang laps rin ako bago sumunod sina Darwin at Lukayo. Hindi ako nagkamali, parehong swimmer ang dalawa. Matapos pa ang ilang minuto ay nakisali na rin si Pinuno at ang kanyang kasamang si Luna Mystika na mukhang kapatid ni Sirena. Halatang hindi sanay sa lamig si Luna Mystika kaya't tinuruan ko pa itong ilubog ang kanyang buong katawan upang ito ay masanay sa tubig.

Ang sarap sana makipagharutan sa mga kasama namin. Ang sirena ay ready na makipag-arm wrestling subalit walang may gusto sapagkat lahat sila ay nasa iba't ibang sulok ng pool. Ang Prinsesa at Lukayo ay dagling umahon at naupo sa gilid nang magtagpo sila sa malalim na bahagi ng swimming pool. Maaring hindi nila pansin subalit lahat ng mata ay nakatutok sa kanilang dalawa.

---

Nagsimulang maglakbay ang Jose Cuervo at yung Vodka paikot ng lamesa. Ang Tanggero ay si Tasya Pantasya. Si Tasya Pantasya ay isang malaking lalaki na mas mapapagkamalan bouncer sa Palawan Bar sa halip na isang Call Center Executive sa Makati. Sabi nila ay nagbebenta daw siya ng mga Tulips sa mga Amerikano galing Netherlands. Paborito rin daw niya manghimas ng tiyan ng lalaki kaya't hilig niya ang mga chubby.

Si Tasya Pantasya (o si Tsupaeng sa entry ni Dabo) ay higit na kilala bilang isang expertong karinyoso ng mga lalaki. Nang siya ay unang magpakita kina Pinuno sa resthouse nina Pedok, bali-balita na naka-iskor daw siya doon sa artistahin nilang kainuman. Kahit si Darwin na maituturing na pinaka-gwaping sa Encantadia ay butata sa pinakitang galing ni Tasya Pantasya. Simula noon, lagi siyang inaasar na kaya lang niya nakuha ang binatilyo ay dahil pinakitaan ito ng limpak-limpak na mga credit cards.

Noong gabing kami'y nagkasama sa tagayan nakita ko siyang kaharutan si Ewok.

---

If there is something I learned about the new batch of guys joining our group, it is that you will feel their loyalty to Centurion/FireFox. From being challenged and later abandoned during our first run, he is now the undisputed leader of a very active thread in Guys4Men. He can block anyone who crosses his path, and can walk in places assured of an entourage behind his back. Things have indeed changed and as his long-time companion in the world of PLU cyberspace, I am happy that he finally found his place.

It was already 2 am. The biggest casualty during our liquor run was Bloiggster. Darwin fell as well. Good thing, there was a willing lap to catch his head. As Dabo slept in one corner and Luna Mystika was being looked after by Pinuno somewhere in the cottages downstairs, I realized that I was in an unfamiliar company. Good thing Tsupaeng was a great host and a master entertainer.

His stories would later change my way of seeing things.


El Tumbador.

-tobecontinued-

Encantadia (Act One)

Ask me not where they got the name, but the group has been expanding since Pinuno created a new thread late last year.

This new expansion brought new faces. Some were interesting, while many would just come and leave when their intentions did not mix well with the aims of the group. In PLU Group Dynamics, the biggest threat to any Barkadahan is the Kariran. The Outsiders had to leave PEx behind when we felt that the group was being ripped apart by newcomers, who often ended up being an eye-candy or the cannon-fodder of some older members. The Alliance remains a small and informal community of PLU bloggers. Whatever turbulence we have as a group remains isolated and easy to overlook with each successful reunion. Meanwhile, the core of the Tripper's Clan immediately realized how convenient it is to manage a tight and very exclusive clique to further its aims. It may not have the ancient brotherhood of the Outsiders, or the loose bond of the Alliance, but you can see in the eyes of each member how every group activity leaves them looking forward for the coming one.

The dynamics of Encantadia is very different. It began as a kariran group during its earliest reincarnation. Its first grand eyeball triggered a split between the core and what kept it steady through the fractious months was its regular Tagayan sessions in Quatro and DB Bar. Those who stayed behind waded through the division by recruiting new members until the core had its complete reunification last December. As for the new members, many of them have moved on for one reason or another. Those who faithfully remained were the first comers - the ones who witnessed my arrival in the thread after first meeting the Diwata two years ago.

The continuous movement of people made me cynic about how the group runs these days. The rookies I met last January were no more. In their places were the ones the core had an inuman a few weeks ago. Since my absence prevented me from meeting these guys last time, (for I was in another social function that night) I decided to remain distant until the new ones were able to blend with the group. It was my stand even when it was Darwin who put up a swimming party for Encantadia. Had it not for my bigger objectives I set early this month, my presence during the welcome inuman for Bloiggster when his plane landed from Cebu last Friday would already suffice.

However, I realized the importance of this event after some deep reflections. First is that it was a Despedida get-together for a friend who is leaving abroad. Our relationship may not be close, but he is one of the core members of the group. Second is that Darwin rarely organize activities for Encantadia. To put down his passion without any consideration is something I may regret in the days to come. Finally, two invited guys only agreed to show up if I would come as well. Though they may do so in their own accord, still it would be easier to convince their presence if I throw my hat in support.

So I said yes to the swimming party even if I would lose a week's clubbing moment in Malate.

---

My shift was over by 5 pm. The two other guys invited were Dabo and Lukayo. We all agreed to meet at the Alliance Headquarters, which is a ride away from the office. Barely slept and barely eaten, it was certain that I would most likely power down even before the inuman starts later that night.

We left an hour later to rendezvous with the rest of the gang in Cubao. Uncertain of the provisions brought by Darwin's group, we decided to procure our own supplies. Lukayo parked his car in front of KFC and then we went to Shopwise to buy bottles of mineral water and chips in case we run out of food at the resort.

It was already past 7 in the evening when everyone showed up. It would be a long trip going to Antipolo so we left even without getting introduced to the others who arrived.

---

Masaya sa loob ng kotse ni Lukayo. Palibhasa ay medyo sanay na akong makasama silang dalawa ni Dabo sa lakaran kaya't chill ako na kasabay sila. Habang papunta sa Cubao ay nagsosound trip pa nga kami gamit ang Ipod ko. Evolution ng House Music ang subject ng aming kuwentuhan. Tinuro ko sa kanilang dalawa ang signature sounds ng bawat clubs na pinasukan ko at kung ano ang signs ng isang clubber na PLU.

Habang paakyat ng Antipolo ay sa amin nakisabay si Pinuno at ang kanyang kasamang si Misteryoso. Si Misteryoso ay tila parang nakababatang kapatid ni Dabo dahil sa kulay ng kanilang balat, built ng kanilang katawan at hawig nila sa mukha. Buong gabi nga namin silang inasar dalawa, lalo na nung magkasabay nilang pinagpiyestahan ang inihaw na Bangus sa lamesa. Malayo ang biyahe at halatang ramdam na ng driver ang gutom at pagod. Bilang pakisama ay hindi ako kumain o kaya naman ay umidlip habang hindi kami nakakarating sa aming patutunguhan. Madalas ay sabay rin kami magyosi dahil alam kong yun na lang ang nagpapalamig ng kanyang ulo.

Maraming pasikot-sikot ang ginawa namin sa Antipolo. Convoy kami kaya't medyo mabagal ang ahon paakyat ng bundok. Bago makarating ng simbahan ay nadaanan namin ang ledge kung saan nakipagsentihan ako sa isang kaibigan sa entry na Ridge Racer. Sariwa pa rin sa aking alaala ang gabing iyon.

Makipot ang daan sa bayan kaya't medyo nagkaligaw-ligaw pa kami bago makuha ang aming kakaining hapunan. Mabuti at naroon si Bloigg upang magsilbing aming navigator. Kumaliwa kami sa isang kalsada hindi malayo sa crossing patungong Tanay at Taytay. Madilim ang daan at tila walang mga sasakyang dumaraan dito. Nakita namin ang billboard pagkarating namin sa dulo. Loreland Farm Resort ang kanyang pangalan.

Pasado alas-nuwebe na.
Pagod ang lahat ng tao
at si Lukayo ay mukhang mainit na ang ulo.


Si Pinuno at ang kanyang Sayoteng lobo



- tobecontinued-

The Gisele Bündchen Ipanema Experience

The guys who read my blog regularly know that I'm very bobo when it comes to fashion. I don't even know what Chuck Taylors are or the difference between a Boot Cut and Skinny Jeans. I own a pair of rubber shoes which I bought from Fila three weeks ago at 70% discount. The other footwear I have at my disposal were hand-me-downs from cousins abroad.

I sometimes even walk barefoot at home.

So imagine my surprise when I was invited to this Flip Flops launching event at Le Souffle last night. It's like WOW! I get to dine in a fancy restaurant for FREE, and get to see a runway and fashion show up close without being dragged by the security out of the room.

It's all thanks to Mugenblog, which is somewhat getting more attention lately.

The footwear launching event was a blogger affair attended by prominent Bloggers from around the city. Known as the Ipanema Seeds Collection Launching, the flip flop brand introduces a new line of high-end tsinelas which is promoted, designed and worn by Gisele Bündchen herself. You ask me who Gisele Bündchen is and my immediate answer be "she's a fashion model!" and that's it. But if you ask Miss Lyka Bergen who this fashion model is and I'm sure he will tell you her family history and even the list of brands she modeled for during her entire career.

I don't know much about flip-flops. The ready-to-fling one I have was bought by my mom at the supermarket. I laugh at people who goes gaga over Havaianas, Grendha and Flojos. However, when I was thinking earlier how to set Ipanema apart from the other flip flops in the kikay department, one thing came to mind.


If I can spend my money on footwear, why not spend it on flops that promote the environment?

Yes my dear friends! That is basically the main thrust of the Gisele Bündchen Seeds Collection. The line actually gives part of its earnings to the Haribon Foundation for its drive to restore the dwindling rain forests in the country. Since my advocacy is focused on the environment, I say "bring it on papi!" I don't mind getting an Ipanema this summer for my first attempt to accessorize so long as something good for the planet will come out of my pimping.

So that's it guys. The event is a first for my blog and I hope to feature more brands in the coming entries. Don't be surprised if I start modeling as well. Haha. And before I forget, I have something for sweet pea, who should have been there at the launching with me.

The Berthgiver (Last Part)

Strange how some people would speak of love like it is meant to last forever. They would brag about it; perform strange rituals and daring exploits to flaunt their affection for one another; and make oaths and promises that such love would endure even the test of time. A person smitten by romantic passion would embrace deception to get hold of what they feel as real. But in truth, love knows only moments and what remains beyond infatuation is bittersweet memory that is meant to last a lifetime.

Despite this reality, I always tell those smitten by love to snatch every opportunity to feel it flowing in their being. Love is like a virus that inhibits your mental functions. You can never tell when it will contain you; but the moment it does, its infection would leave you unable to grasp even the most rudimentary vocations of your sensibilities.

On the second day after being introduced to FireArcher, things were far from ordinary. Our sweet text exchanges continued and as a result, it felt like walking in the clouds. Despite the toxic campaign season which threatened to overwhelm me, I found myself basking in my little box of sunshine. The Chairman of the Party would demand more cash donations to run the political machine and just for them not to distract my attention, I would give away whatever cash I have in my wallet. I still cannot forget how I was able to give up my two thousand peso savings out of sheer joy when FireArcher agreed to a meet up the next day.

---

It was a Sunday afternoon when we met in Vito Cruz. He belonged to the home of Green Archers and to see him in his environment was his home court advantage. Pleasantries were exchanged and the conversation began rolling. Nobody knew in PEx that we would see each other. I was a sneaky bastard who wanted him for myself. For if the others knew what was going on, I would be put to the cross the next time a reunion will be called.

The meet-up was a landmark achievement that I've even forgotten my girlfriend who was looking for me that weekend.

Previous social engagements dictate that a coffee date or a little snack hangout should be in order. That was how I conducted my affairs in the straight world. I never knew that FireArcher had something else in mind. Smitten by his charms, I let go of my command and instead followed his direction.

His trail lead me to the side streets of Malate - behind the university he often bragged about in the forum. Dazed and unable to speak for myself, I entrusted my innocence and friendliness to his responsibility. We found ourselves sitting next to each other, on a two-person bed, whose soft blue striped sheets relaxed the senses. Nobody was inside the house except for us who were merely hanging out in his room at the farthest corner of his place. He turned on the stereo which played light alternative music. In my calm and inviting surroundings, never did I sense that hostility was just around the corner:

To subtly switch a topic into something more provocative would invite danger - A peril which my instinct was still unaccustomed to in those early days.

I cannot recall the things we have talked about. He must have said something about his school, his culinary talents, and even his past relationships with men. At 18, I learned how advanced he was compared to me who was just about to enter a life of queerhood at the age of 20. The conversation went on, until we gradually delved into subjects that were too intimate to even mention when being alone.

Out of nowhere the initiation began:

"Hey can I ask you a favor?"

"Ano yun dude."

"Is it alright to kiss you?" A sudden brush of coldness run up my spine. It took me a few deep breaths before I could respond to his question.

"Sure, it's alright with me..." I saw his pearly whites shine on his face. He must have brought me to his place just for this moment to happen.

FireArcher moved closer. I felt his warm breath melting my lips. A seething heat burned my body, while my shaky hands froze in excitement for an orgasmic end from the person who just poisoned my heart.

I closed my eyes and waited for the kiss he will plant on my lips. Slowly, he positioned himself for a passionate assault. As I crossed the point of no return, I felt fear, passion, and thrill for something I have never done before. There were so many things running in my head: acceptance, a secret romance, a life that will never be the same again.

Who would have thought everything would start from there.

The skirmish broke out a few minutes before sundown. He began by assaulting my lips with lip-locking caresses. I was able to taste his sweet saliva but my nicotine-laced tongue repelled him away. Too bad, my defenses were strong enough to push him back. Had I chewed a gum before his initiation, the kiss might have lead into something more. He tried another attempt to make out, but when he saw me shaking violently, his senses took over. A hasty retreat was in order and I was spared from a white and sticky explosion I wasn't ready yet to give a try.

---

There were no traces of guilt when I left his apartment. Instead, the premature disconnection left me hanging in mid-air after a climax wasn't achieved in our attempt at copulation. FireArcher promised me to expect another round the next time we meet. On my way home, he said the reason for leaving me in peace.

"Masyado ka kasing kinakabahan kaya hinayaan na lang kita." He explained. "Pero next time, magpapaputok tayong dalawa hehe."

The prospects of having a carnal rematch left me with a hard-on that I had to pacify the moment I entered my room. Believing that there was something between us, I became bolder in my manner of expressing my feelings toward FireArcher.

Unfortunately, it was a one way understanding. What he simply wanted was to get me.

Our text exchanges became a trickle a few days after our failed engagement. He said he was busy with academics so I just decided to leave him alone. Much as it was difficult to return to the life I had just abandoned, picking up the pieces was my only choice. The girlfriend never learned what happened and so were FireArcher's devoted admirers in the group. These boys would later confess their feelings, only to be turned down without even reaching first base.

It would take another seven months before someone would successfully overrun my newly fortified camp. I met him in the chat room and we took advantage of his friend's generosity when she entrusted to my mate the keys to her apartment. The guy happened to be extremely frisky that evening, while I was determined to change my image into something naughtier after being told that I'm too nice for a non-straight guy.

By then, FireArcher had become a mere preface to a story about my self-discovery - whose nearly-forgotten memory resurfaced a few days ago. The recollection was triggered when a kid who happens to follow my blog suddenly confessed his sexuality to me during our conversation in the Yahoo Messenger.

The date of my initiation was February 17. Seven years later, here I am providing a berth place to someone who found himself out in the open sea and into the same body of water I crossed blindly without a berthing place to anchor myself to the ground.

---

[12:22] kidblogger001: ang hirap kasing maging masaya pag ka ung kasiyahan mu eh mali sa panigin ng ibang tao..
[12:23] MuGen: ang hirap kasing maging masaya pag ka ung kasiyahan mu eh mali sa panigin ng ibang tao.. - kasi hindi mo pa tanggap ng buo ang pagkatao mo
[12:23] MuGen: intayin mong dumating ang
[12:23] MuGen: panahon

Dalawampu't Limang Ako (2K9 Remix)

Ang tag na ito ay galing sa kasamahan nating blogger na si Aris. Bilang isa sa kanyang mga tagahanga, isang karangalan ang mapabilang sa mga taong nais niyang makilala ng lubusan. Ang mga sumusunod ay dalawampu't limang mga bagay tungkol sa akin.

1. Tatlong beses sa isang linggo ako kung magbuhat. Sa Eclipse iyon sa Shaw Boulevard. Maraming cute at magaganda ang katawan sa gym namin, pero higit na palakaibigan ako doon sa mga bagong dating na tabain ang katawan. Lagi ko kasing naalala kung paano ako nagsimula sa gym na iyon.

2. Sa kabila ng kakayahan kong makipaglandian kung kani-kanino, higit na tumino ako nang magkaroon ng korte ang katawan ko. Kung papasok man ako sa isang relasyon, asahan mong monogamous ako sa kabila ng mga temptation na maaring magtulak sa akin upang ilabas ang kalibugan sa iba.

3. Natutulog ko ng nakahubad at laging bukas ang TV.

4. Sa sobrang babaw ng kaligayahan ko, ang makasaksi ng paglubog ng araw sa hapon ay sapat na upang makapagpaligaya sa akin. Gayun din ang makakita ng bituin sa langit tuwing hatinggabi.

5. Mga paborito kong gulay: Malunggay, Okra, Baby Corn, Mushroom at Cauliflower.

6. Comfort food ko lately ang Binalot.

7. Kinikilala ako ng mga tropa bilang isang pakawalang lalaki. Ibig sabihin, kapag gusto kong umalis sa isang pagtitipon, walang makakapigil sa akin saan ko man gusto pumunta. Pahirapan rin sa akin ang magpatali. Subalit kapag gusto ko ang isang tao, literal na nahahawakan niya ako sa leeg.

8. Halata mo na ako'y umiibig kapag nagsimulang maging alternative ang playlist ng mp3 ko. Kapag hindi sumasablay ang pagkanta ko ng mga alternative songs sa videokehan, ibig sabihin, nasa paligid lang ang aking mahal.

9. Pasayawin mo na ako kesa pakantahin. Kailangan ko muna tumumba sa kalasingan bago mapakanta ng maayos.

10. I often write in Filipino when I'm suffering from a writer's block.

11. Sobrang gusto ko magroad trip. Minsan nakikicar-pool ako sa mga kaibigan para lang maka-ikot ng buong Manila sa kanilang sasakyan.

12. Pwede naman gamitin ang sasakyan namin sa bahay para dito, subalit hindi ako marunong mag-drive.

13. Size 12 ang sapatos ko. Kapag nababanggit ko ito sa mga prospects, madalas ay lumiliwanag ang kanilang mga mukha.

14. Hindi ako naniniwala sa langit at impyerno. Mas pipiliin ko pa ang konsepto ng reincarnation.

15. Sa kabila nito, makikita mo akong taimtim na nagrorosaryo sa Santa Clara sa Katipunan tuwing day off.

16. Antukin akong tao. Kahit saan kaya ko matulog. Huwag lang sa mabahong lugar.

17. Marami ang nagsasabi na magaling akong humalik. Ayoko man magbuhat ng bangko pero dalangin ko na ito'y hindi bola.

18. Hindi ako nakakatagal sa ibang bahay ng higit sa dalawang araw. Kung magoovernight man, dapat dala ko ang kumot galing sa kama kung hindi ay mamamahay ako.

19. Favorite Shampoo: Clear. Favorite Soap: Dial Favorite Facial Care Product: Nivea For Men (Yung Green) Favorite Deodorant: Axe Gravity

20. Ayaw na ayaw kong mag-malling. Kung may bibilhin man ako, diretso kaagad sa pupuntahan sabay sibat kapag nabili ko na ang kailangan.

21. Pero pangarap ko mag-grocery kasama ang aking future lover. Tapos yung lahat ng pinamili namin ay ilalagay sa trunk ng kanyang sasakyan. Tapos yung mga grocery ay para sa bahay. Tapos papakilala ko siya sa nanay ko na kasama kong namili sa Puregold.

22. Gusto kong makarating ng Ilocos, Batanes, Cebu, at Tawi-Tawi.

23. Mahilig lang ako magsulat pero tamad akong magbasa. Natatakot kasi ako na kapag nahilig akong magbasa ay tamarin na rin ako magsulat.

24. Out ako sa kaisa-isa kong barkadang straight. Puro sila lalaki at sa kabila ng aking preference, mukhang tinanggap na nila ako.

25. Lima ang grupo ko na mga PLU: Outsiders (PEx) Hanap Barkada (PEx), Alliance (Blog) Encantadia (G4M) at Tripper's Clan (PEx) . Wala ni isa man sa mga grupong ito ang regular na nakakasama ko sa clubbing.

I am tagging Dabo, Lukayo, Blakrabit, Maxwell, Darwin at ang sweet pea ko na si Mel Beckham

The Forks

A silhouetted image of me taken by Dak while snapping a photo of the diffused head lights from a vehicle in front of us.


People's Palace in the Sky

Foghorn

The ascent begins at the base, near the picnic grove overlooking the famed lake. It will be a two-mile trip to the summit where thick clouds marching from the south have assembled to surround the prominent peak. The heaving dark clouds, like a dragon coiling around the hill is posed to swallow the crown on top of the mount, and we, as curious spectators is about to venture into the most outrageous drive of our lives.

Darkness shrouds the landscape as the Jimny revs for a steep climb. The narrow road twists revealing sharp bends whose deep ravine have already surrendered to the abyss. On cloudless days, the ledge reveals rolling hills and plains as far as the eyes could see. In the distance, beyond the lake, is the shimmering splendor of the sea, whose briny air beckons the marauding clouds to return to its depths.

But the path now, whose faint yellow divider lines is slowly fading into the fog. The silhouette of trees warn of an impending fall; the absence of specter of lights glowing from blurred lamp posts tell of yielding. Yet we must go on and never stop, lest a vehicle sharply turning on a bend might suddenly hit us from behind.

Sliding the side window, fluffy white smoke enters the car: the fog dancing gleefully to announce its victory to us. A whiff of icy air chills our nostrils, while pearly beads of rain water splat on our skin. The road ahead is now veiled behind the clouds but despite these trepidations, we crawl forward to continue our journey.

Halfway between the base and the summit, we parked, took a leak next to the ridge, and surveyed the hidden layers of our surroundings. Howling winds blow against our face as we stood our ground hoping for a heavenly parting to happen. An icy chill permeates our skin knocking our bones to submission, yet we never faltered: A crown seeks to be discovered hidden above the clouds.

We walked towards the final gate only to find it bolted. The wind is still howling and as the clouds encircle to make its final push to swallow our sanctified ledge, there is no choice but to rescind. With no place to stay and only the frosty elements to keep us company. We return to the Jimny and surrender our fate to the embracing mist.

---

People's Palace In The Sky
While waiting for another vehicle to get us back to the base

Thank you guys.

Mobile Personal Carrier

May kasabihan na makikilala mo ang isang tao sa kuwartong tinutuluyan nito. Malalaman mo ang kanyang vanity level, ang kapraningan nito sa buhay at kung gaano siya kaayos at orderly sa kanyang sarili at sa kanyang paligid. Madidiskubre mo rin sa pagtingin sa kanyang kwarto ang mga bagay-bagay na mahalaga sa kanya - kung ito ba ay sarili, pamilya, o kaya naman ang mga materyal na gamit na siyang nagbibigay kabuluhan sa kanyang pagkatao.

Sa kuwarto mo malalaman ang interest ng isang tao. Dito mo rin malalaman ang kanyang intellectual o kaya naman ang kanyang physical leanings; Kung ito ba ay mahilig sa gadget, o kaya naman sa libro, o mas priority niya ang sports higit sa anupaman. Kung ang isang tao ay walang sariling kuwarto, sa kanyang maliit na espasyo - maski man ito'y isang papag o backpack lang ay malalaman mo rin ang mga bagay-bagay tungkol sa kanya.

Take for example ang kaibigan nating blogger na si Dabo.

Isang linggo matapos niyang i-post ang kanyang New Year's entry, sariwa pa rin sa aking isip ang kanyang "Mi Amor Karton" na litrato. Ewan ko ba kung bakit masyadong napukaw ng litratong ito ang aking damdamin. Iyon ba ay dahil higit kong nakilala ang kanyang koboy spirit? O dahil noong mga panahong iyon ay wala man lang ni-isa sa amin ang nakaalam kung gaano kapayak ang kaligayahan ng aming kasama.

It makes you wonder, but I'm really impressed at how simple his pleasures are.

Subalit hindi tungkol doon ang aking entry para sa araw na ito.

Kung si kaibigang Dabo ay may kakayahang mag-survive sa isang karton bilang tulugan, nakakatagal naman ako sa isang bag na, sa maraming pagkakataon ay halos mawarak dahil sa bigat ng mga laman nito. Ang bag na ito ay nasa akin na rin ng mahigit kalahating taon. Umulan man o umaraw ay lagi itong nakasakbit sa aking likuran tuwing ako ay nasa labas ng bahay. Dahil isang bag lang ang ginagamit ko, minsan ko lang yata ito napalabhan sa aming kasambahay.

Nitong gabi ay nakatanggap ako ng bagong backpack mula sa isang kaibigan.

Matapos itong ilabas sa plastic bag, kaagad kong napagpasyahan na iretiro na ang aking lumang bag. Malungkot mang isipin ang mawalay sa kasa-kasama mo ng maraming buwan - ang iyong personal mobile carrier na naging saksi sa buhay mo sa labas ng bahay, ito'y makakabuti para sa bag, lalo pa't manipis na tela na lang ang bumabalot sa ilalim nito

At dahil nabanggit ko sa simula ng entry ang koneksyon sa pagitan ng personality ng isang tao at mga bagay na nagrereinforce dito, I'd share to you the contents of my bag.

Wala sanang magrereact sa mga gamit na araw-araw kong dinadala sa lansangan:

• Wallet
• Ipod Nano
• iPAQ Cellphone
• Menthol Inhaler (dahil trip ko na laging may sinisinghot)
• Lighter (na inarbor ko kay Macoy bago siya makipagtanan kay Miss Bermuda)
• Water Tumbler
• Basketball Shorts (kapag gym day, may kasama itong face-towel at sando)
  
• Gym Gloves (na nangigitata palagi sa dumi)
• Timer na nakalagay sa cigarette canister
• Clinique Happy na spray (na pa-krismas gift ni Lukayo)
• Tatlong pack ng Frenzy (in case of emergency hehehe.)
• Stuff toy na aso (na lately ko lang narealize na reincarnation pala ni Dominus)
• ID sa office (na hindi ko pa nasuot kahit minsan)
• Bible, New Testament
• Maliit na wooden rosary
• Prayer Book na bigay ni Mama

So hayun, heto rin ang mga bagay na ililipat ko sa bagong bag. Nakakatuwang isipin na matapos ang ilang araw na pag-iisip kung bibili ba ako ng bagong lalagyan ng gamit o hindi, siya namang timing ng pagkakaroon ko ng backpack.

And true to the nature of the person from where the backpack came from, this new personal mobile carrier shall bear witness to my outdoor stories from now on.

May my life be with this keeper as interesting, as the giver of it wished himself to have.

Muñeca Emisaria

Greetings my lady, welcome to the realm of Jomania. My name is Mugenbear, the heart and soul of this place.

My name is Darkstar, the protector of the pristine wilderness of this kingdom.

And they call me Pulsar the Pink. Hyuk.. Hyuk.. I am the one who keeps the balance in this fair land. How may we assist you?

Great tidings my lords. My name is Qiki, the beautiful and voluptuous ambassadress from a land far far away. I have come bearing good intentions from the omnipresent one, Master Neil of the great nation of Camhalla.

In behalf of all that is left of Jomania, we acknowledge your most esteemed one, Ambassadress Qiki. Hyuk.. Hyuk..

Thank you. Your graciousness will be noted in the annals of Camhalla. Anyway, lets get down to business shall we?

The guardians of Jomania are listening my lady.

Great. I have heard that this land is a home to dolls like me. Whispers tell of a princess who keeps the harmony in this place a long time ago. I do not know what happened and nobody in Camhalla knows your land's legends. Is it possible to seek their audience?


... [silence]

You speak of folktales ambassadress. Hyuk.. Hyuk.. We do not know of such dolls. If they have ever existed, then they have preceded us by eons.

Only the three of us remain in this place, but yes, whispers tell of a world they call Grenesia. The land was blessed with life. Unfortunately, tiny nation-states battle for supremacy in that realm. They set up fortresses and kingdoms perched on top of the hills or deep inside the caves. Legends tell that some of these tribes were gifted with exceptional talents that they can make objects fly. We do not know how such powers exist, but it is what the folktales reveal.

Interesting. We never know of such people in Camhalla. Is there a way I can reach out to them?

We do not think it is possible my lady. Grenasia is a world far different from the realm of Jomania. However, we do believe that some of the tribes have survived the war and the ones left are resting deep beneath this land of serenity. We leave you to explore this place. Maybe, just maybe, your presence might awaken them again.

Thank you very much. I have more questions...

Alas, our time has come to leave. Seek and you will find. May the infinite wisdom of this land guide you in your quest. Goodbye Qiki.

Wait... Don't leave me alone please!!

Heaven's, they left.

---

-tobecontinued-

The Mugenblue-Odinhood Pact

Introduction:

This agreement seeks to achieve two goals for the parties involved: emancipation from lust and focus on other matters which include, but is not limited to career or academics pursuits. Designed with one thing in mind, the Mugenblue-Odinhood Pact assures both parties entering into this contract of a stress-free existence away from the complexities of Cyber-PLU engagements. The pact will significantly limit both parties' ability to seek hook-ups, dates or non-straight acquaintances with the aid of the internet.

Points of Unity:

• Both parties agree that they will refrain from using gay hook-up sites for pleasure or social purposes. Upon effect, they are bound to delete or abstain their presence from Guys4Men, Downelink, Manjam, Dudesnude and other sleazy websites where contact with another non-straight is possible.

• Both parties agree to keep their Friendster, Multiply, Facebook and other social networking sites under the guise of being heterosexual in content and nature. It is forbidden to create another alter-profile for any purpose it will serve.

• Both parties agree to inhibit their presence in chat applications which can turn hostile to the party under agreement. Both parties are strongly discouraged to access sites such as MIRc and Yahoo Rooms or participate in any cyber conversations which are deem sleazy in nature.
  

• Both parties agree to keep the points of unity open for provisions and amendments. However, the basic framework of the Pact revolves under these three areas of understanding.

Limit and Scope of the Alliance:

The Mugenblue-Odinhood Pact applies only to cyber engagements. Public encounters and incidents shall fall under the direct responsibility of the party engaged in such act. The Pact shall cease effect when one of the parties involved willfully breaks just even one of the three points of unity above. The pact will also cease effect when one of the parties under the alliance enters into a harmonics* contract with a third party or when Odinhood completes his academic requirements five months upon the beginning of this pact.

Executed this 24th day of our Lord. November, 2008


Blogged:



mugenblue.blogspot.com
odinhood.blogspot.com

---

*harmonics contract - formal romantic engagement.

Isang Aral Mula Sa Pinuno

Soft is the heart that is hinged and emotion kills any attempt of reason to mount a defense. Lust can always be misread as love and in the prayers of hope and in the slumber of dreams, we are being mislead from the truth that everything is just a temporal consignment. We wait like a warrior without armor, wishing that the lost soul approaching will turn out to be a comrade and not a bogey.

Sadly, allies don't appear all the time.

We learn, after the dust had settled to never trade lust for an assurance of attraction. Intimacy may never grow from a field sown by an orgasmic need. Human nature can hide its icy face behind the warmth of affection and as its coldness numbs the skin,

it leaves the body to shiver, and wither and finally succumb to its arctic sleep.

---

[20:23] centurion: nahuli ka na siya sa weakness mo

[20:23] centurion: i mean.. nahuli na niya ang weakness mo

[20:24] mugen: honga no..

[20:24] centurion: tingin mo ba.. hindi niya alam na may tama ka sa kanya?

[20:24] centurion: at habang meron.. sinasamantala niya..

[20:24] mugen: ganon ba yun?

[20:25] centurion: sa isip niya.. " sex object lang to para sakin." since may tama sakin to... at magaling ka SOP... pwede na to

[20:25] centurion: nasasatisfy mo lang sexual needs niya

[20:26] centurion: nagawa ko na yan joms...

[20:26] centurion: remember yung kwento ko sayo na na inlove sakin na taga las pinas?

[20:26] centurion: he satisfied my sexual needs.. naging fubu ko siya..

[20:26] centurion: kahit alam kong may emotion siya para sakin..

[20:27] mugen: if that is the case

[20:27] centurion: 5 times kaming nag sex

[20:27] mugen: i should then stop

[20:27] mugen: everything.

[20:27] centurion: much better

[20:27] centurion: ayain mo muna ng LIVE SEX... pag kumagad.. victorious ka.. then.. dump him

---

Two months, fifteen days and counting. I will give it up to the one who truly deserves me.

Unless Darkstar intervenes

or Mugen gets deceived.

Roadtrip

Malayo ang maaring lakbayin sa loob ng dalawang oras:

Eclipse-Puregold, Shaw
Blumentritt, San-Juan - Extreme
N. Domingo, Aurora
E. Rodriguez - Fahrenheit
Timog Avenue
Mother Ignacia
Quezon Avenue Circle
Kowloon House Kalayaan
Carlos P. Garcia - UP
Katipunan - Ateneo
C-5 Libis
Kalayaan, Global City
JP Rizal Makati
Pioneer, Pasig
Edsa, Makati-Pasay
Roxas Boulevard - Baywalk
Pedro Gil, Malate, J. Nakpil
Pedro Gil, Santa Ana
San Andres Bukid
Chino Roces, Inquirer
Buendia, KFC

Malayo pa sana ang ating mararating kung hindi tayo tinawag ng ating mga nanay upang pauwiin sa kanya-kanyang mga bahay. Bitin man ang roadtrip at kwentuhan, but I'm so happy that I've done it with a free spirit like you.

Congrats sa Regularization.

Hanggang sa ating muling paglalakbay.

---

No matter where my feet would bring me tonight, just to let you know, I still remember and I would always treasure the memory of our ride.

Payatas Tragedy Revisited

Huli man daw at sandali lang nakisali sa piging, nawa'y ang entry na ito ay magsilbing tugon sa pagmumulat mo sa aming natutulog na diwa tungkol sa kahirapan ng buhay maralita.

Maligayang kaarawan, kaibigan.

---

PARADISE LOST
Three months after the infamous tragedy, Payatas residents still remain disturbed.

It was 8 o' clock in the morning when she stood in front of her house to gaze at the never-ending sight of garbage - - a mountain of filth that would later bring tragedy and death to hundreds of residents of the Payatas dumpsite. In a split second, as she vividly recalls, all hell broke loose. The earth rumbled as the mountain of garbage came rolling down, burying her neighbor alive farther down below. July 10 - the fateful morning when the nation was shocked at the tragedy that occurred.

As for Aling Norma, life became much more different. Her house stood ten steps away from the buried shanties so she miraculously survived. As she tells us how she managed to run away from the waves of garbage falling down from the mountain, her tears roll down, a sign that everything is still as fresh as the day it happened.

"Apat na anak ko ang nalibing ng buhay at may isa pang hindi nakikita" (Four of my children were buried alive and one is still missing). She speaks while watching Backhoes dig up piles of garbage in front of her.

As she recalls, they were the squatters behind the Bureau of Internal Revenue Building. They were relocated to a site called "Lupang Pangako" (Promised Land). At that time, the place was still filled with grass. But when the Quezon City government turned it into a dumpsite, all garbage coming from Metro Manila was dumped there, turning it from fields of grass into a mountain of trash that we see today.

A minor landslide occurred during the mid-90's, but this "warning" was not heeded by the residents living there and by the government that watched them. Last July 10 2001, a year after the Cherry Hills Subdivision tragedy in Rizal, the east side of the Payatas Garbage Mountain collapsed due to continuous rains, burying hundreds of families under tons of rotting filth. Overnight, hundreds of cadavers were recovered, while some survivors were lucky enough to be alive. Throughout that week, bodies piled up in the nearby basketball court. The stench of death hanged over Payatas while garbage piled up in Quezon City.

It was a week not to be forgotten, yet somehow the people in Payatas are trying to fill up the spaces left by the tragedy that happened only in this country.

Today, around 210 recovered bodies were already identified by their respective families while 49 others remain unidentified. Aling Nena claims that there are about 75 people still buried under the piles of garbage while many of the residents living there were relocated somewhere else. Out of the 8 areas of Barangay Payatas that was hit by the landslide, five were completely wiped out. The task force assigned by the Armed Forces of the Philippines (AFP) in the area will terminate their rescue operations of October 15 while the Payatas dumpsite will cease its operation temporarily while plans about its future development is still being formulated.

There are rumors that the sight might be turned into a memorial park in memory of the numerous victims of the tragedy.

As for Aling Nena and the rest of the residents living in the area, they will not wait for the government to relocate them again somewhere. They had accepted to let the tragedy be left in the deepest recesses of their minds.

Leaving the dumpsite, we can still see the despair in the faces of the residents caused by the tragedy despite their smiling faces and seemingly normal lives. While the site lingers in our view, over the distance lay the municipalities of San Mateo and Montalban and the La Mesa Water Dam.

- with reports from Kapre

---

Article written during my junior college year for our news magazine finals project. Grammar lapses and word usage were left uncorrected to give respects to its young aspiring writers. Now that my zest to experience the other side of life has been awakened, expect more blog entries that delves on these subjects from now on.

Thank you Gibo for letting my eyes see again.

The Not So Naughty Me

Pasado hatinggabi kanina, nagkamali ako ng sinakyan na jeep galing sa gym. Sa halip na ibaba ako ng aking sinasakyan sa mismong kanto patungo sa aming bahay, sumakay ako ng JRU na ang biyahe lamang ay hanggang Kalentong. Ang lugar na ito ay lubhang napakalayo pa sa bahay at isang napakalaking kahangalan kung susubukin ko man ang maglakad pauwi.

Habang nag-aabang ng jeep patungong Quiapo ay nakaramdam ako ng gutom. Naubos ko na nga pala ang reserba ko sa pagbubuhat at ang kumain ay dinidikta na ng aking sikmura. Naglakad ako hanggang maabot ang panulukan ng Shaw at Kalentong. Dito kasi ay may Banco De Oro na siya namang bangko ng ATM ko.

Akmang magwi-withdraw na sana ako nang makita ko ang isang karatula na nagsasabing offline ang bangko. Asar. Tatawid na naman ako upang magwithdraw sa isang ATM na nalampasan ko na sa aking paglalakad. Ayaw ko nang lumayo. Either magtitiis ako ng gutom magdamag o kaya naman ay iintaying mag-online ang BDO. Bahala na.

Lumapit ako sa ATM upang kilatisin ito. Ang karatula ay nakatakip sa screen subalit patuloy pa rin ang paglabas ng ads ng bangko dito. Mukhang may pasaway na nakaiwan ng karatula samantalang ang ATM naman ay online na.

Tiiiiiiinggg!!! Bigla akong nakaisip ng ideya.

Nakapaglabas ako ng P200 galing sa ATM. Nabusog ang aking tiyan matapos lumamon sa Bestfriends malapit sa aking tinitirhan. At bilang souvenir ng aking pagiging delinkwente, at reward sa pagiging loyal account holder ng Banco De Oro,

umuwi akong may pasalubong sa aking kuwarto.


---

Postcript: This post is not actually about my delinquent tendencies. The entry is for a friend who left the country yesterday to find his calling abroad. It might take years before his return, and his departure left a gaping hole, that, no matter how I try to fill will remain spaced out.

If he never found this blog two years ago, I wouldn't be able to introduce him to a new tripper friend who related to what he had written. From there, the friendship bloomed. New people joined our little alliance and despite not being able to see each other regularly, I know that our bond is strong.

The alliance reconvened two nights ago in Cubao to express our wishes before his flight. As a souvenir, I asked for his lighter.

I will keep it until he returns.

This is how we will remember Macoy

- club bath
- dial 911
- shishi-kitsune accords
- surprise visit at the enterprise para magyosi
- red mitsubshi lancer
- bisita iglesia
- enchanted kingdom
- inuman sa quatro with roy, centurion, dn and dodong.

Respite

Friday, August 8, 2008

It is easy to put words behind these pictures and I wouldn't mind foraging the ends of the earth for the perfect poem to leave lasting colors to these moments.

However, fluid thoughts run dry these days and I prefer the comforts of wordlessness to complement my newfound addiction to silence.

I would have said more, but I'm not ready.
Hesitation steals whatever fruit my mind bears.

However, to convey my deepest gratitude for sharing a pleasant afternoon journey, and for lending back your song to intoxicate our sober muses,

I give back my voice so you wouldn't be alone in your flowering.

Because as we tread the long road ahead; like during the plunge from the sky-clad mountains of Tagaytay back to the smoggy plains of Cavite, only the thoughts of a gleaming Manila Bay, which you could not believe yourself shimmering like gold dust beyond the rolling hills of Imus will make us remember everything.

Until the next time we see each other again D.

Salamat ng marami sa pag-akay.

Singularity Device

In our common grief
and common pain
and common struggle,
we learn to rise up.
Because we know,
nobody else
could do things the way
life taught us.

In our common comfort
and common understanding,
even if miles and our own lives
will keep us apart. You know,
I know.

There is a singularity
that will always connect us both.

Thanks for the dinner
and the conversation my friend.


- Tokyo Cafe, SM Mall Of Asia

Wanda Ilusyonada

Note:

Ang sabi nila, kapag umabot na sa rock-bottom ang iyong relasyon, it is best to seek advice from an effeminate for fresh insights daw about love. Ewan ko kung totoo yun. Basta ang alam ko, mas magaling sila mag-handle ng relasyon at mas masakripisyo sila sa kanilang mga boyfriend.

Isang bagay na pinanindigan kong gawin bago isuko ang naunsyame kong buhay pag-ibig ay balikan ang isang entry ni Wanda Ilusyonada na inaasahan kong makakapagbigay-gabay bago ako magbitaw ng desisyon.

Dahil sa entry na ito, pinili kong talikuran ang lahat ng poot at sa halip, pansamantalang tanggapin ang mga bagay-bagay para sa ikakatiwasay naming dalawa.

Saan ka man naroon Wanda. Salamat sa entry mong ito.

---

Dennis da Chenes: ACT 1

"... but once in a while i get caught
unaware by the thought
that you cared once and
then memories resurface once again ..."

- forever and a day

pag nakarami ka na ng beerangga at sesenglot-senglot ka na at naka-shombay kayo sa isang parking lot sa baguio at OA na utong mo sa pagka-baktong at yung bibig mo e umuusok kahit wichelles ka namang nagsusubarachi at si sunshine cruz e nagbabanta nang sumilip any monument, kahit aneklavu pa i-isplukatsina nung ka-chikka mong boylet e super deadma ka na.

kasi bet mo nang umeklipany-mae (matulog). tapos yung naririnig mo na lang e puro ka-eklatan.

take it away, ida. TIME SPACE WARP, NGAYON DIN!!!

college. kunu-kunuhang shala na hotel na wa namang heater yung shower. 3 days-2 nyts na field trip. ambaduy nung field trip. kahit baguio pa itu.

sabi ni dennis sakin, "ang ganda ng mga stars, no? eklat - eklat - eklat ... special tong gabi na to ... eklat - eklat - eklat ... parang pakiramdam ko lahat masasabi ko sayo ... eklat - eklat - eklat ... i dunno why im telling you all these ... eklat - eklat - eklat ... i like you ... (walang eklat tong part na itech) ... you know what, i like you ... eklat - eklat - eklat ... potah, anlamig. diyan ka lang, naiihi ako ..."

tapos chinikka pa niya kay atashi yung buong medical history nung pamilya niya. pati yung jinsan niyang jortista tsaka basketball player e paki ko naman, davah?? pati yung dis-abantejes ng pagkakaroon ng matangos na ilong (gaya nung tumatama yung ilong pag umiinom sa baso), pangto-two time ng dati niyang gufra-mae (gf), pati yung pagiging alcoholic ng pamilya niya na may i wonder ng O si atashi kung bakit niya ko pinapahirapan ng ganitembang.

at sa isang biglaang moment of saylenz e hinalikan niya yung lola mo. liptolelang galore. lipchukan to da max. siyempre polite-politan si atashi kaya naki-kiss na rin akiz ahihihihi at dahil may gulat factor ang kissing scene, may ka-join itung pangingilo ng iping nagkatamaan. ARAY!

aksyon spiks louder than words, mga bektas. sa aksyon na to, nabingi talaga ko. nag-disappearing act yung mga ka-eklatan, en por da pers taym in history e na-heardsung ko siya at yung gusto niyang sabihin.

AT PARANG UMINIT BIGLA SA BAGUIO, SAN KA PA???? (sabay kindat ang bakla hehehe)

pero may dramang pasabik yung lola mo. sabi ko, wag ngayon. wag dito. igalang mo pagka-babae ko. kasi na-sight ni atashi yung plashlight ni edGARDo angara. e bukas na yung polo ko at nashonggal ko na belt niya. lecheng mga sekyu to, may pagpapatrol pang nalalaman.

"akyat na tayo ..." sabi ni dennis. feeling ko na-offend siya na akechi yung unang lumayo sa eksenang lovapalooza.

"eh gusto kita ..." sabi ko. bumabawi si bakla.

"i know ..." sagot ni dennis. confident itech! nagfi-feeling na ampotah!!!

"anong you know?"

"hindi ko na nga namalayang wala na pala akong belt eh."

hehehehe skill yan. may lahing ninja yata tong badidang na to. wag ka mag-alala, papa-seminar ako.

tapos itinulog na lang namin yon. kinutuban akeiwang may second serving ng ka-eklatan eh. kamustahin naman natin ang puson, godivah?

nung sumunod na gabi, patulog na lahat. tumambay ako sa parking. sa mismong sulok kung san kami nag-lapchukan ni dennis. loner-loneran kunwari. hoping and wishing ang bakla na havs ng repeat performanz.

"may problema ka, bakla?" phone in question ni donita, ang bessie kong babaeng nyoklita, na kala mo siningaw ng lupa at may i apir itu bigla.

"umakyat ka na ..." sabi ko. "past your bed time na."

"as if naman tatangkad pa ko." kasi pinaglihi sa hobbit si donita. di ko lang ka-sure kung mabuhok rin yung paa niya. pero may duda ako hahahaha ..

"umakyat ka na sabi e!"

"uy! may poot ang delivery," side comment ni donita. "may booking ka, no?"

"wala," sagot ko.

"umamin ka, bakla. kilala kita. hindi ka bababa ng baguio nang wala kang ginagawa."

kureksyon, donita. nagawa. past tenz itu

"kala mo naman sakin, pokpok ..." depensa ni atashi.

"hindi. tamang makati lang ... mag caladryl ka nga." at nagsimula siyang magtuturo ng kung sinu-sino, "siguro yun yung booking mo ... ANG KATI MO TALAGA!!!"

"AY! sumpa ka, impakta!"

tama namang dumaan non sina dennis pati yung tropa niyang adik sa ragnarok na kung bet mong jumoin sa clan-clanan nila e kelangan may dsl ka sa balur mez, nagra-ragna ka tsaka kelangang pagtuunin ng karampatang pag galang ang lahat ng klase ng beerlalei at alkohol sa 7-11.

literal na dinaanan lang akiz non ni dennis. wa pabati. wa chikka factor. wa haller at kung anufaflu. wa man lang kiss, kahit hindi french. kahit yung flying lang.

bitter-bitteran ang bakla na bumuntot sa hobbit pabalik sa hotel. asa ka pa. wala ka nang kiss chenes-chenes.

tapos tumunog yung nyelpons ni atashi. si dennis. nagpadala ng smiley hehehehe (punyeta, ba't kinikilig pa rin ako???? ambabaw ampotah!!!)

sa 9 months na tinagal namin, maraming moments na sumagi sa isip ni atashing kumalas na. parang naging habit ko na nga siya non. wit ko lang ka-sure kung talagang hurt-hurtan akechi o betsung ko lang mag power trip at mag feeling na pipigilan niya ko. aminin, bin der bin dat babaeng bundat ka na sa mga eksenang ganito.

pero say nga ni dennis nung unang attempt kong makipag-break, "nobody said this was easy." awwwww ... LECHE! planado na sana yung kilig episode ni atashi kaya lang na-discovery channel ng lola mo na pinirata sa songhits yung linya. KABOG!

pero simula nung moment na yon, tuwing sinusumpong ako ng mannerism kong makipag-quits na lang at break na, bumabalik ako dun sa umpisa. kung saan lahat nagsimula. hindi ako literal na umaakyat sa bagyo. kumbaga sa negosyete tsaka sineskwela, magbalik aral tayo ...

sa ka-eklatan. sa smiley. sa kauna-unahang lovapalooza. at sa malamig at mahamog na parking lot sa baguio.

kasi, at eto tandaan mo tuwing nalulubak yung relasyon mo, "nobody said this was easy ..."

pero yung sagot ko don, "no one ever said it would be this hard ... oh take me back to the start ..."

kamusta naman, davah? sa na-unsiyameng relasyon namin ni dennis, na mala-cheapipay na hayskul musical ang drama, gamit na gamit yung songhits talaga. san ka pa!?!

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Wanda Ilusyonada Blog

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Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard

Oh take me back to the start

- Coldplay, The Scientist

Mirror Universe

Alas-kwatro ng madaling araw. Mahigit sampung magkakabarkada ang lumabas galing sa Providence Vito Cruz matapos ang isang magdamagang kantahan. Ang lima sa kanila ay bagong salta sa grupo, samantalang ang natitira naman ay taon na ang binibilang sa kanilang samahan. Ang hangin ay sumisipol sa kalangitan. Ang mga yero nama'y tila pinapagpag sa pagkakapako sa mga bubungan ng bahay. Sa malayo'y isang transformer ang kumislap na parang kwitis. Kasunod nito ay ang pagbagsak ng kable ng kuryente sa kalsada.

Ang mga pangitaing ito'y hindi ininda ng magkakabarkada.

Nagsimula silang maglakad sa kahabaan ng Vito Cruz upang tumbukin ang Quirino Avenue. Doon ay may matatagpuang McDonald's na bente-kwatro oras bukas. Isang binata ang sumusuray sa kanyang paglalakad. Ito'y inalalayan ng isa sa mga baguhan na noong gabi lang niya nakilala. Madilim ang paligid at walang ilaw sa lansangan. Nang sila'y dumating sa kanilang patutunguhan, ito ay brownout. Sa halip, ang mga kahera't service crew ay nagsisilbi gamit ang tanglaw ng kandila.

Matindi ang hagupit ng hangin sa labas ng McDonald's. Ang mga nabaling sanga ng mga puno'y tila nagproprotesta sa daan. Tanging mangilan-ngilang taxi lang ang nagdaraan sa tapat, samantalang ang mga gumimik naman mula Malate'y tila ambon na unti-unting pumapatak sa pintuan ng restaurant.

Kanya-kanyang kwentuhan ang magbabarkada. Mayroong isa na nagbibigay crash-course sa iba't-ibang paraan upang pakinisin ang mukha gamit ang makabagong teknolohiya. Ang isa naman na balikbayan ay nagkwekwento kung paano siya pinag-aralan ng mga doktor sa San Francisco matapos siyang magkaroon ng Bulutong-Tubig doon. Ang iba naman ay nagtatanong tungkol sa buhay-buhay ng mga bagong pasok sa grupo.

Kung mayroon mang isang bagay na hindi napagusapan noong umagang iyon - na sigurado ko'y pagku-kuwentuhan ilang buwan at taon mula ngayon, yun ay ang bonding na naganap isang madaling-araw, habang ang lansanga'y binabayo ng hangin at ang kalasada nama'y unti-unting nilulubog ng tubig baha.

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Meanwhile, Tripper celebrated his birthday party last night. Everyone from the "Alliance" showed up - even his non-blogger friends that we get to meet when Trip hosts our Toma Session at his place. Hard Drinks overflowed, the Seafood Pasta was delicious and those who showed up had a story to tell.

Jiban the dancer is already hooked up to House Music.

Macoy the silent operator has a brand new SLR Camera that he used to take pictures of the Santan flowers outside Tripper's pad.

Dabo the sweet loverboy is very fond of his newly found "interest."

DN was officially introduced by Gripen to the group that afternoon,

while TL still, is the official entertainer of the Alliance.

I was drunk the whole night and went to work this afternoon still nursing a terrible hang-over from last night's unforgettable stormy revelry.

Seething Anger

"bakla ka carlo amf ka! pangbakla ang kwento mo hayup ka! kaya dumadami ang mga baklang katulad mo dahil sa mga tulad mo rin na walang kwenta! pwe!"

- Carverhouse, The Shock

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The compassionate Buddha once said that "words can both destroy and heal." He added that "when words are true and kind, it can change our world." If only everyone understands the meaning of this powerful message, the world would be a better place to live. Unfortunately, hate has prevailed over the blogs yesterday, when an anonymous reader posted the comment above in one of Carlo Vergara's entries about Zsazsa Zaturnnah.

The comment struck deep for reasons I cannot fathom myself. All I know is that there is a seething anger inside me that wishes to come out - and land on the face or chest or any part of the body of the poster, that is strong enough to leave that loser decapitated for life. I wish to avail the services of a hacker to find out who that reader was, and shock him with a surprise visit at his home or workplace and tear him apart, which he deserves.

Isn't it ironic that I'm quoting the great sage when my thoughts sway towards violence? If only I can extend my patience in times like this.

Maybe it is the feeling of frustration that is driving me to call on my darker agents to harbor brooding thoughts. After all, the person who is in the line of fire used to be one of my pillars when I was just crossing the line of my sexuality. Now that I am strong enough to stand on my own, I just felt compelled to run towards his defense and share the pain he must be feeling at the moment.

They say that artists must suffer for their craft before it can be a masterpiece. From how Vergara wrote his most recent entry, it was clear that he is totally stunned by the words he received. The impact and gravity of the hate comment created ripples that must have jolted his muses and it stopped weaving images to turn it into a work of art.

I expect that his blog will only speak silence in the days to come.

I remember Manila Gay Guy had the same fate some six months ago. An anonymous gay reader questioned the validity of the author's personal sexual accounts simply because he cannot understand how Miggs' apparently inferior attributes can sway gorgeous and cute men such as a basketball player or a married lawyer to have an affair with him. The reader who questioned the author's stories eventually lost, while MGG prevailed and went on to become a more influential blogger after his ordeal.

Meanwhile the discovery of Agent Boytoy's personal identity had forced him to close his blog permanently. Since I do not know the real scoop behind the issue, it is safe to assume that it was another gay person that destroyed Ahente's will to share his work to those who faithfully followed him.

I kept my silence while these two bloggers were grilled, questioned and humiliated by those who cannot stand their prominence. A part of me felt guilty because I haven't done enough to express my condemnation to the people who were trying to silence them. There were times I asked myself why some people would say bad things to others without looking first at their own shadow? Is this what psychologists refer to as the "deflection method?"

There were times when I used words to hurt others in order to shove to them what I stood for. I thought that I was just merely stating my opinion, when in fact, I am already breaching somebody's personal space. However, even if such breaches occurred, I never used words to see another person's spirit gets crushed by its power.

There is always a corresponding weight on every thought or opinion that I said, for others to see what I am trying to justify with my point.

In Carlo Vergara's case, it was obvious that the anonymous comment was written out of capriciousness, or maybe a fit of jealousy, or the commentator just felt the need to hurt others because he cannot bear the weight of his own suffering. Such poor creature. Maybe it is best to leave the person alone to wallow in his own hatred of life.

Yet the issue never stops there.

As reactions begin to flood Carverhouse's last entry, it seems that only one person is actually assaulting the author's sensibilities with shallow and hurtful comments. What's most sickening about it is that while reading his comments, there is a hint that a dissatisfied gay person is behind the bullying. When I seek wisdom from experience, I learn that no homophobe or religious bigot would ever use gay lingo to break a gay person's will to exist.

In realizations like this, I ask myself if there is hope for people like us. Should I let my inner rage take over and turn against those diva-divahans who think the world is their stage?

Or should I let the memory of Ada and Dodong suppress my hatred for these subhumans and let this issue die a natural death?

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1:19 am. Zaturnnah answers.