We met him after several weeks of absence.
Perhaps it was God's will that brought him back to us, but suffice to say, I am overjoyed with this landmark dinner between them. I am ecstatic to see them together again, knowing how happy he is meeting him again after enduring weeks trying to forget him.
It's like a new morning for the three of us, it even overshadowed the looming dilemma that's happening in my group right now.
I spent the last two days mourning over what's happened in the circle lately. The news came trickling in, and to quote a friend, "those things we avoided and condemmed before had already happened right in front of us, we never saw it coming but it has already consumed the majority of us..." Even the core was not spared. Rumors are flying in, but this time, for the sake of everything I hold dear, I'll keep my silence about those things.
Many times, I asked myself why such things did happen? How did we avoided this disaster before? I know, I was a slut once, I was the pioneer of all these nice things, but I didn't showed that face inside, it was always beyond their eyes and ears... but why did it happened here?
There are so many lingering questions in my mind, and honestly, I am just trying to swallow everything one by one. However, one thing will forever stay - the dream is over. the constellation will prove that we're just the same like all others.
Perhaps, i would end my "pulis pangkalawakan" career tonight... I just found out that I was indeed alone in this battle - to protect whatever we believed was right.
Before this evening, my outlook was very grim. Very disheartening. I don't know where to run for cover, for enlightenment. I don't know who I could trust on this matter. I wanted to say it all, yet I know that saying these things to someone would dishearten him too. It was worse than I had previously been informed and now, we're just some steps before obliteration.
Yet tonight, we are resurrected. With his return, I feel alive again. And with return, I can finally begin my life elsewhere. Perhaps, in another space, perhaps in another time.
I'll end this blog not knowing how things would happen. The constellation will always remind me that dreams may not come true in one's lifetime. Perhaps it will, in another circle and in another time. But for now, I'll keep my silence. I'll try to accept everything as it is and learn that not everyone is perfect.
This is the phanksmaster... temporarily signing off.
Perhaps it was God's will that brought him back to us, but suffice to say, I am overjoyed with this landmark dinner between them. I am ecstatic to see them together again, knowing how happy he is meeting him again after enduring weeks trying to forget him.
It's like a new morning for the three of us, it even overshadowed the looming dilemma that's happening in my group right now.
I spent the last two days mourning over what's happened in the circle lately. The news came trickling in, and to quote a friend, "those things we avoided and condemmed before had already happened right in front of us, we never saw it coming but it has already consumed the majority of us..." Even the core was not spared. Rumors are flying in, but this time, for the sake of everything I hold dear, I'll keep my silence about those things.
Many times, I asked myself why such things did happen? How did we avoided this disaster before? I know, I was a slut once, I was the pioneer of all these nice things, but I didn't showed that face inside, it was always beyond their eyes and ears... but why did it happened here?
There are so many lingering questions in my mind, and honestly, I am just trying to swallow everything one by one. However, one thing will forever stay - the dream is over. the constellation will prove that we're just the same like all others.
Perhaps, i would end my "pulis pangkalawakan" career tonight... I just found out that I was indeed alone in this battle - to protect whatever we believed was right.
Before this evening, my outlook was very grim. Very disheartening. I don't know where to run for cover, for enlightenment. I don't know who I could trust on this matter. I wanted to say it all, yet I know that saying these things to someone would dishearten him too. It was worse than I had previously been informed and now, we're just some steps before obliteration.
Yet tonight, we are resurrected. With his return, I feel alive again. And with return, I can finally begin my life elsewhere. Perhaps, in another space, perhaps in another time.
I'll end this blog not knowing how things would happen. The constellation will always remind me that dreams may not come true in one's lifetime. Perhaps it will, in another circle and in another time. But for now, I'll keep my silence. I'll try to accept everything as it is and learn that not everyone is perfect.
This is the phanksmaster... temporarily signing off.
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