Into the Kamikaze

In just a few hours, the eye of the storm would make landfall in Aurora.



As early as last night, the war drums has already been sounded. We have adequately prepared for this storm and we're relatively confident that we can sleep all night knowing that our home is safe.



I went to work this morning, despite my mom's concern that signal number 2 has been raised in Metro Manila, well if I have a choice, I would have stayed home and prepared everything myself. But after knowing Phanks would go to work too, I concluded that it was the right thing to make a living in this ungodly day. If ever he would need my assistance in the afternoon, I could be just one jeep away.



The whole morning was spent in listening to the radio, particularly the AM station. We were constantly tuned in to the storm updates, so that we could have an idea whether going home at 2 would still be ok. The whole morning, I kept on sensationalizing the news, claiming that signal number 3 was already raised in Metro Manila, to keep my colleagues relatively pressured and eager to go home.



However, it seems a lull had fallen on our skies, despite the thread Yoyong posed in southern luzon, everything seemed so calm outside - aside from the dark skies, there was only a slight breeze blowing from the west.



Things changed though in the afternoon. Leaving the office at 4, I decided to head on to Pedro Gil and wait for my significant other. It wasn't a long wait though since they were dismissed at 5. We immediately headed towards the LRT station, pushing ourselves to the immediate train

that stopped, since I know,



time is running out.



---



Habang papalapit kami sa monumento, naririnig ko na ang sipol ng hangin galing sa labas ng tren. Ang sipol na yun ang nagbabadyang panganib na maaring harapin ng libo libong taong nasa labas pa ngayon. Isang malakas na bugso ng hangin humampas sa kaharap kong bintana. Sa hindi ko malamang dahilan, parang isang multo ang nakita ko sa pinagbuntong-buntong na butil ng ulan na dumikit sa salamin.



Sa oras na iyon, muling bumalik sakin ang kagimbal gimbal na alaala ng nakaraan. Mag-isa sa kwarto, hindi alam kung ano ang kahihinatnan bukas, habang dumadagundong ang bahay at sumisigaw ang hangin sa labas.



Kanina, ramdam ng puso ko ang takot.



---



On the way home, my mind was clearly elsewhere. I was hoping to arrive earlier before the storm pushes in. Learning from the news, the storm would actually make a landfall by 10. Just like what I have predicted.



Ever since I've been independent, I've been good at calculating things.



---



Now the winds are again blowing outside, I can almost hear the cone... blowing in the air. The threat of power interruption is almost near. It seems like what I dreaded before will come knocking again on my windows.



I can feel the ground trembling...



The steel support of my window is continously shaking.



---



The truth is, I am really afraid and sickly worried.



I am not used to the approaching silence... and monotony. I wish my bud is here with me.

I wish I am not just the lone guy in the house.



---



Magbro-brownout na.

1 Deciembre, 2004

The news of the approaching storm left me panic-stricken and restless. I’ve been so engrossed thinking about work, Phanks and internet this past few days, that I had completely forgotten a storm, which is about to arrive.



This evening, after confirming the news of its arrival, and the strength it possesses, I immediately checked in the internet it’s predicted trajectory. It will directly pass through several provinces north of Manila, the website said, it would probably hit Pangasinan, Cordillera and Ilocos.



Its trajectory brings the super typhoon close to home…



very close to the loved ones which is the reason of my worries right now.



---



The last time a storm with such strength hit Manila, was when I was in high school. If I could remember it right, it was Rosing and it hit Bulacan directly that morning. However, due to the comical relief our neighbors showed as they frantically tried to patch their rooftops as the winds furiously blows on every corner, the ordeal was a little bit bearable. In fact, it was more of a sightseeing galore, watching the neighborhood prepare too late, for the storm which was already there.



The second time a strong storm threatened Manila was when I was in college. It passed at dawn and the winds were really pounding my side of the house. What makes everything more dreadful is the deep howl of the wind, the sounds you would hear in the movies as the ground shakes a little since its very foundations bear the brunt of such pounding..



I’m not so sure but from what I’ve heard from the movie Twister, it was called the Cone Of Silence. Probably the reason why I dreaded hearing those wind howls is that it reminds me of how grave the situation is - the long, deep billowing sound of the wind announcing the coming of the delubyo overhead will surely make every normal human person fall down on his knees (not literal of course.)



But what worries me more is that this time, I will be the only man in the house.



Every bit of responsibility, from ensuring that my mother dearest and my little sister would not bear the brunt of this storm, to Phanks’ own welfare and protection in their home rests in my hands. In fact, I told him to prepare too, since we don’t know how much damage this catastrophe would bring.



There are a lot of scenarios playing in my mind right now. I know it happened before; I felt this dread long before. I’ve slept through a night of endless pounding on my window as the sky swells from the bloody red clouds hanging overhead. We are a survivor already.



With a little transistor radio close to me, as the grand masterpiece of heaven converge on top of our heads, may we survive another close call,



And let those who will fall, find peace and freedom in the heavens and beyond..